Newsletter #271

Well, three wins on the trot, and after pleas from Linda, Ashley is being allowed back into the country and I am making the supreme sacrifice by heading off to the States for two weeks in an attempt to secure some more wins. I shall be interested to sample the true horror of the Mcivta expat!

Usual contents, match reports, opinions, general happiness (well, that ain’t usual I guess!), a note re the Fans’ Committee at the club and a moan about the ticket office (haven’t had one of those for a while). I’m slightly surprised there has been little feedback, plaudits or howls of outrage re Franny’s statements about moving to the Millenium Stadium. What do people think about this?

Ashley is back at the helm again as of the next Mcivta. My thanks to him for entrusting it to me in his absence. The Poynton family, exiled in Bristol, are hoping to get up for the Bolton game if we can come by tickets, so will hope to see the usual crowd at the Old Abbey for some well-considered Guinness testing. One of the pleasures of being the editor has been running Micvta though the MS Word spellchecker. Some of the treats that came up were the suggestions that Paul Beesley should be Paul Beastly, and even better, Brian Horton should be Brian Hotrod. :-)))

This one goes out to 1327 subscribers

MATCH REPORT LIVE I – Southend, Nationwide League. Saturday 8th February

CITY – SOUTHEND 3-0 (Saturday 8/2 1997)

Gio Kinkladze’s father watched from the stands as his son again inspired City to a convincing victory with a magical second-half display. Yet in the first half he might as well not have been on the field as the Blues struggled to break down the visitors’ defence and were booed off at half time. City never looked like losing the game though, and could have broken the deadlock twice in the opening period but Neil Heaney spurned both opportunities. It seemed clear that once City scored, the game would open up and there’d be a few goals in it; that proved to be the case.

City took the lead four minutes into the second half when Rösler charged through from about 40 yards out, holding off a defender and shooting under Royce in the Southend goal. It was just the sort of chance he’d been missing in the last 12 months and it’s good to see the Uwe of old back with us. Kinkladze nearly made it two with a lovely, curling 20-yard free kick which came back off the far post. It only took a few more minutes before he got on the scoresheet though; running into the right hand side of the penalty area, he checked back, looked up and, having set his sights with the free kick from just a few yards away from where he was standing, curled a shot just inside the far post. The man is a genius. He wasn’t finished either. A run reminiscent of his goal against Southampton last season took him into the penalty area where he set up Rösler to score from 10 yards. Uwe bowed in appreciation of Gio’s service.

Southend nearly pulled a goal back near the end with their only decent chance of the game but the shot went wide and Wright wasn’t troubled. In the end this was a comfortable win achieved without firing on all cylinders. Gio, Uwe and Buzzer all had good games (here’s a first, the Kippax chanting Summerbee Jnr’s name!) but Lomas had a stinker and we played far too many hopeful balls in the air, particularly in the first half. Beesley had a solid début in place of the injured Kernaghan but in truth he wasn’t really tested by a lacklustre Southend side.

MATCH REPORT LIVE – II

City 3 (0) vs. Southend 0nited (0) 0
Saturday 8th February 1997, Nationwide League Division One
Weather: Fine
Referee: Graham Laws (Whitley Bay)
Team: Wright, Ingram, Crooks, Symons, Beesley, Lomas, Kinkladze, Horlock, Heaney (Jeff Whitley), Rösler, Summerbee.
Unused Subs: Creaney, Margetson.

The new sense of optimism pervading the Maine Road atmosphere was a little stunted during the first half. In truth and in spite of the widespread whinging going on around me, City looked comfortable to the point of not needing a ‘keeper. Tommy Wright’s goal was so rarely troubled that you could believe Southend were under orders not to cross the halfway line.

City’s threat amounted to a lot of huffing and puffing, with a Heaney header being about the closest we came to scoring. The impressive Horlock fought for every ball in midfield and our new defender looked composed and assured alongside Symons although it was hardly a baptism of fire.

As half time approached the only certainty was that City were definitely not going to lose this match and I have only rarely had this feeling in recent years.

Soon after the restart, Horlock headed a beautiful through ball to Rösler direct from a Southend goal kick. Uwe ran onto it and smashed an unstoppable drive from 20 yards into the top corner. Gio was really on song as well, threatening to embarrass Southend every time he took possession. Two other firsts for the season were Summerbee’s name being chanted (adoringly!) and also a caller to GMR’s post-match phone in who talked of Buzzer’s Brazilian-like skills! He certainly had a good game and was unlucky not to score when Gio set him up. His shot hit one post, flashed across the goal-line and went behind on the other side.

The second goal came from a Gio run which started in City’s half. He beat a couple of players before curling a delicate chip over the ‘keeper’s head, another Gio wonder goal. Gio nearly bagged another when he hit a free kick which looked harmless enough before it banana’d ‘cruise missile like’ into the post and rebounded into the box. It was Gio again who created the third when another unbelievable dribble finished with him squaring the ball to Uwe who gratefully accepted the chance and his shot was deflected in.

A fairer score would have been at least 5-0. I’m only sorry FC didn’t take over a month earlier.

Ratings: Wright 8, Ingram 7, Crooks 7, Symons 8, Beesley 8, Lomas 7, Kinkladze 10, Horlock 9, Heaney 6, Rösler 8, Summerbee 8.

MATCH VIEW – WATFORD … or … LONG WINDED WAFFLE :-))

[Jeremy, this is sort of a cross between a match view and an opinion on our current revival with a couple of other bits thrown in. I guess you could stick it in under the general title of “Long winded waffle” :)]

My second home game of the season and what an improvement it was over the shambles against Tranmere. Back then, I began to doubt whether it really was worth spending £60.00 minimum to make the trip from London to see complete garbage like that. This time around, I also had to book time off work but it was definitely worth it.

The match was certainly not a classic and you could even say we were under-performing compared to recent efforts but we never looked like doing anything but winning. Watford played a pretty dull game and were rather fortuitous to equalise; I haven’t seen a clearer foul on one of our players all season and our defence just stood still, gobsmacked, and practically let them walk the ball in the net.

I have to admit to – what is known as – “having a go” at the referee at the time (nothing to do with the copious amounts of falling down juice consumed, no sir!) but on reflection any good defence must always play to the whistle. We should be used to abysmal referees by this stage of the season and nothing should surprise us. I am certain our new backroom staff will have noted the incident and will be impressing its importance on all our players (Uwe included; he has a tendency to miss chances because he’s not expecting rebounds, etc.).

To be honest, I can’t remember too much of the second half; I was in the left hand side of the Kippax and constantly craning my neck to the right to try to see what was going on at the other end! We were camped in their half and in the last 15 minutes started to take the mickey, toying with Watford. Whilst I think it’s a bit un-sportsmanlike and we should be honing our killer instinct by really going for the kill on these occasions, it’s been so long since I saw it with my own eyes that I can forgive the team having some fun.

Good to see Heaney getting a goal. I was beginning to wonder if we needed to drop him then he goes and gets a good poacher’s goal. A selection problem for Frank Clark to sort out but exactly the kind of problem we want!

What about Buzzer Jr? Maybe he’s off the booze? It’s the only explanation I can give. I’ve always quite liked him and have seen fit to defend him in the past on the rare occasion. Lately though, in my eyes, he was beginning to get the reputation of being a player who, when he plays well, the rest of the team have a nightmare! My support of him was fading but not any more; respect to him for finally sorting his attitude out. Better late than never.

Uwe is much, much, much better now. I always think you can judge his performance by the ratio of headers won to “arse on the ground” situations. This has been very high likely and long may it stay that way. His goal was sweetly taken but it was a real gift, a long ball bouncing over one Watford player and being passed into his path by another. No complaints about the finish. He has missed many easier chances than that this season.

The confidence of the team must be sky high now, with a few players doing some pillow dreaming about what suit to wear for the final. We do actually have our best chance of getting there for many a year now. With the (ahem!) big five all out, we have it in us to beat Boro, fluke a home draw to Brum/Wrexham and then it’s semi’s time.

But but but the Cup does not matter. It’s the League that matters. I would instantly swap any Cup run for a play-off spot and FC, from what I have read of him, knows this. The confidence has stemmed from FC and his backroom boys (the City mag interview is well worth a read as they sound like a breath of fresh air) have made the players believe in themselves again. We’re still papering over a few largish cracks in the side (e.g. inability of the rest of the team to cope with Kinky being man-marked) but I have confidence that we will see these ironed out over the next few weeks. We might still make it to that 6th spot. Hell, why not!

Wednesday night, I managed to extend my record of never having seen us lose in an F.A. Cup match or at a weekday fixture – a total of 10 or so games. Before the Brentford game, one of my friends said he only ever saw us lose when I went so ’97 has changed that and I will now have to go to every single Cup game in the fear that if I miss it and we lose, it will be all my fault, again (incidentally I have also never in the flesh seen us lose in a match played live on telly which must be some kind of record).

Also paid my first visit to the City shop in the Arndale. Thankfully, someone was with me who knew the way, I never would have made it by myself, it’s a labyrinth! A bit on the small side but there are some nice goods on offer. Picked up a superb maroon scarf with the City/Oasis logo on and a couple of bits and bobs. I didn’t see the “City til I die” T in there – probably because I didn’t know it existed at that point – and have just ordered it by ‘phone. Twelve pounds for the shirt is OK but two pounds fifty (for a pint of lager!! … excuse me, obscure comedy reference, don’t worry, I am mad) for postage and packing is a bit of a rip-off.

Back to the Oxford game; living in the Carlton/LWT area, we’re the only ITV region not to get live games. Typical. I would have gone up if I had known it would be pay on the gate and if I hadn’t woken up after midday! Anyway, I managed to tune my TV into another region (I’m in Finsbury Park so… Anglia?) with a heavily distorted picture and the much appreciated commentary on Radio 5. I could just about tell which way the action was going but even I could tell that Buzzer should have been awarded a penalty. Is there some sort of competition to see who can make the most bizarre or stupid decisions going on here? Bring in Mulder and Scully, I say!

Looks like Plymouth might be getting Phil Neal and not Alan Ball. I feel so relieved for any club who avoids a brush with the dreaded squeaky one, possibly the most reviled of all City managers ever? Just been to their web site to say as much and that they should give Phil Neal a chance if he gets the job. Wasn’t right for our job but he may be for them.

A dash of humour: What’s the difference between Frank Bruno and Man United? Bruno made it to the fifth round (not sure if that’s true but why let that get in the way of a bit of rag baiting? Nice to see the City mag calling them Rags as well).

Tickets for next Saturday are on open sale Wednesday. Bring on the Boro! This has turned into a rather long waffle so I’d better shut up now after categorically stating that City are back!

MATCH VIEW – SOUTHEND

Combined a family party in Swinton on the Friday night with my first visit to Maine Road for a long time to see City play Southend.

The “wife to be” forsake the offer of a shopping trip to Bolton to come and watch, only her second ever live match. The first being the farce against Swindon last November on my birthday. What a birthday treat!

Having confined all (my limited) attendances to the South, Crystal Palace, Reading, Swindon I was hoping the Lee curse would finally be gone (Roger not Francis). The first half confirmed my worst suspicions, Oxford and Watford had been a dream. Forty five minutes seemed an eternity and I spent most of the time admiring the ground from our lower tier seat in the Kippax and listening to the rantings of an absolutely biased fanatic. Jan suggested that FC give the team a good talking to a half time and we went to get a drink.

Why can’t you buy black coffee at half time? I settled for a lukewarm Bovril.

FC obviously heeded her advice and after five minutes we were one up. We had a brilliant view of Kinkladze’s curling 20-yard free kick which came off the left-hand post. When he scored a few minutes later some idiot ran on the pitch and kissed him before being ejected from the ground. I hope it was worth it.

Rösler’s second goal was set up by a piece of genius from Gio. From where I was watching he appeared to beat several men, taking the ball into the penalty area and stop the game before putting the ball through for Rösler to score, Rösler’s bow showing his appreciation.

The only poor performance was from Steve Lomas, who I thought was dreadful and Horlock wasn’t anywhere as near influential as in his début at Oxford.

My two pennys worth on Gio, will he stay will he go?:

He has no need to play in the Premiership to be in his National team so he should stay until the end of the 97/98 season at least.

If money is one of the issues, whatever he wants would be worth it. The £5 million+ we would get wouldn’t buy anyone as influential or a greater crowd puller. City would enter into the downward spiral of falling gates, falling revenues, poor performances, further falling gates etc.

If current form under FC continues, City will make the play-offs this year and be back in the Premiership next year. If we miss them and he should give FC a full season, then if we’re not back then he has given the club a fair chance and he could leave having shown immense loyalty.

Yes the four hour drive to Manchester from Welwyn Garden City was worth it and I’ll back up for Swindon.

P.S. Jan didn’t seem overly impressed that you could get married at Maine Road now.

NEWS – BEESLEY TO SIGN

City are reported to be signing Leeds United’s 31-year-old centre-back Paul Beesley for an undisclosed fee thought to be around £500,000. He is at Maine Road today (Friday 7th) to have a medical and discuss personal terms.

Lee Crooks has been selected to play for the Nationwide League’s representative side to face an Italian Serie B side. The Nationwide League side is picked by former City manager Brian Horton.

NEWS – BEESLEY SIGNS!

Friday 7th February:

City have signed Leeds United centre-back Paul Beesley for £500,000, and managed to register him three minutes before the deadline, allowing him to play against Southend on Saturday if selected. Beesley was with Frank Clark during his time at Lepton Orient. He’s currently recovering from a bout of ‘flu and will have a late fitness test. Alan Kernaghan, Eddie McGoldrick and Ian Brightwell are all injured, so Michael Brown and youngster Dave Morley have been added to the squad.

City failed in a bid to sign Tommy Wright in time for him to be eligible to play against Middlesbrough next week though. Although he’s not cup-tied, he is ineligible to play because on-loan players are not allowed in the F.A. Cup this season.

OPINIONS – I

Just some casual thoughts and comments…

Jeff Whitley, is he injured or just resting? Considering he’s been a revelation when he’s played and showed a damn sight more commitment than others, surely he should be first on the team sheet, even with his young years. What’s the old adage, if he’s good enough he’s young enough? Mind you, now that Mr Potato Head has got the team playing again there’s no need to throw him in at the deep end. So I suppose a slow, gradual build up is in order.

Cup dreams…

I see the press (namely the MuEN) are mentioning a place in London and backing us for a good run. Come on, be serious this is City they’re talking about, we don’t know the meaning of a cup run 🙂 Anyway we’ve got no chance now, FHL mentioned it’s only 3 games away to the final, that usually puts a nail in the coffin of our Cup hopes as soon as someone at the club mentions the final! Just think though, if by some fluke City did win the Cup, it’d mess up the Rags’ song, <insert year> and won naff all…

And finally Esther…

The great and good Ball… poor old Pilgrims, they’re currently languishing near the bottom of the 2nd Division just outside the relegation zone. Enter AB into the frame; they’ll certainly go down if they do appoint him, he’s keeping his track record going. One thing though, why do chairmen keep employing managers when they’ve got a proven failure record?

OPINIONS – II

The Changing Blues

Having moved away from my beloved Manchester to come to University in Bristol, I had to hand over my much loved season ticket to my mother, to cherish with as much love and affection as I once did. Well at least until I was able to go home for games.

However, this brings me to my main point; having been a regular season ticket holder for 10+ years, until now I have seen every manager from Billy McNeill. Having visited the Academy for the Watford and Southend games I must say I have seen some of the best football seen there. What an improvement on the previous games I have attended there this year (which incidentally was every home game up until Birmingham and the Port Vale, Boxing Day game)!

To qualify this statement, look at three or four key areas. Firstly, Buzzer, a revelation in this new rôle. Then there is Rösler back to the player we first saw. Of course King Georgi, oh God, how long can we hold on to this player? And finally the defence seems to look a hell of a lot stronger.

I don’t know what Frank Clark has done, but long may he reign.

GIO – CAN WE KEEP HIM? I

What to do with Gio.

If we assume that we don’t get to the play-offs and our diminutive Georgian won’t put up with another season of being kicked to death then why don’t we arrange a loan spell somewhere where he’s unlikely to embarrass us such as Barcelona until we resume our rightful place in the Premiership? The only trouble with this theory I suppose is that the likelihood of gaining promotion without Georgi is considerably reduced.

As for strikers, we could always try Buzzer in a number nine shirt after his recent performances 🙂

Can anyone inform me on the progress of Richard Edghill? I always thought he was one of our more exciting prospects.

GIO – CAN WE KEEP HIM? II

Opinion – Mr Kinkladze

I have to say I’m totally amazed at anyone suggesting we should sell the King! Surely we should be looking at strengthening the squad and trying to find a ‘partner’ for Gio with equal ability (a difficult task I admit but how about Curcic from Villa?). That would then make the opposition think twice about man-marking Gio as:-

1. It is rare they have a defender good enough to stay with him, and
2. As only one of the play-makers, it would enable Gio to wander all over the park, pulling big holes in the opposing team’s structure leaving big gaps for our other genius!

Besides, it must be up to Gio alone to decide if/when he moves on. If he wants to go, there is no point in trying to stop him as his heart would no longer be in it, if not then even a £15 million offer should not tempt us to cash in!

GIO – OXFORD MASTER OF ARTS

It is a week since the match and they are still talking about it down here in Oxford. The following is from the regular Friday night Oxford United slot in the Oxford Mail:

“There are some occasions when, however much affection you have for your own team, you have to hold your hand up and admit they were totally outclassed by sheer individual genius. … In the ten years I have been covering Oxford United, it has happened only once before… when Paul Gascoigne was brilliant at White Hart Lane in the F.A. Cup.”

“Rather than feel depressed by Oxford’s poor performance, I felt privileged, as I am sure many fans did, to have been at the Manor to witness such magic…”

I can confirm his last sentiment; many local Oxford fans I know said that after the first half was over they realised they were watching something special and could only admire the spectacle.

My mates also are beginning to understand why I support City. The enthusiasm of the visiting fans, and the way we have taken the bad with the good makes us stand out from the other Manchester team. I have had to be able to laugh at what has been happening to us over the last few years, but my love of the Sky Blues has never weakened. The Oxford fans are also not used to someone who supports a Manchester club actually being from Manchester!

I would add that I also participate in the Bristol City mailing list – also had some very positive feedback there re Gio in the Oxford game.

GIO’S GENIUS DOWN TO RICE PUDDING?

When City played at Oxford they stayed at the hotel where my girlfriend works. Most players had the usual meals of chicken and pasta, but not Gio who was eating bowl after bowl of rice pudding! Apparently he can’t get enough of the stuff and the other players were just ordering more for him. Could this be the wonder fuel that will help City to get back to the Premier League?

THE FANS’ COMMITTEE

Steve Knott, the Fans’ Committee co-ordinator, has asked me to let the City fans on the Internet know something about the Fans’ Committee. It was formed to replace the “supporter on the board” scheme over a year ago which the club felt needed adapting to be accessible to a wider spectrum of City fans. An eight strong Fans’ Committee was formed with representatives from the Official Supporters’ Club, the Centenary Supporters’ Club and fanzines. They meet with Club officials on a monthly basis to discuss various issues concerning the club. The committee set an agenda prior to each meeting and would like to hear from City fans who have matters that they think need to be raised. The Club are willing to listen to any comments, complaints or queries, so if any City fans would like to raise something they feel needs bringing to the Club’s attention, get in touch with me at dylan@itl.net and I will pass it on to the Committee or contact Steve Knott c/o Maine Road.

WILL THE TICKET OFFICE EVER LEARN?

I know that someone from the ticket office gets MCIVTA, so maybe he/she can pass this observation on to his/her manager:

On Saturday morning, while queuing for my ticket for the Middlesbrough match, numerous people came to the front of the line asking where they could get tickets for just the Southend game in the afternoon. When told they would have to queue with the rest of the supporters waiting for Cup tickets, they saw the length of the queue, were p****d off and didn’t bother. Surely, someone managing the office should have foreseen this scenario and opened just one window for people requiring tickets for the Southend game only?

I also heard of another situation on Wednesday vs. Watford where people who had turned up to pay on the gate were turned away because the Kippax was full. There were however, vast open spaces in the Platt Lane end where some of these people could surely have been accommodated.

We should not be turning people away like this, even though we do have the biggest average attendance in the Nationwide and also get bigger crowds than most Premier League teams.

Anyway, ten goals in three games and Gio turning on the style again. Maybe we should fly his mum and dad over for all the remaining games of the season if he plays like that in front of them?

KITS & NEW STADIUM

I’ve just had a thought (strange I know)

1. Could someone please tell me if this is/isn’t the second year ofbeing sponsored by “Brother”?
2. If City are breaking away from Umbro it will mean at least 2 new kits next season, then at least 2 more the season after if “Brother” don’t sponsor City again. After all the ribbing we’ve given the Rags for having Velcro kits (a rip off)!
3. Who’s making City’s kit next season?

FL was saying on GMR before the Watford game that he was looking forward to staying in charge and going to the Millennium Stadium, which leads to more questions:

1. Will we own the ground or rent it?
2. Who`s going to buy Maine Road (note to Martin Ford – do you think if everybody from McVittee chipped in we could buy Maine Road and you could arrange to play some McVitte vs. anybody 🙂 )
3. What about the fortune spent on the new Kippax?
4. What about the new development planed for Platt Lane?

Imagine play-offs and F.A. Cup victories at Wembley, and imagine the cost of all the travelling.

LYRICAL OUTBURSTS FROM THE PAST (mildly censored!)

Old Songs – Kippax late 70’s (and late 60s, early 70’s also – JP!)

If I had the arse of a camel
and I had the wings of a crow
I’d fly over Old Trafford tomorrow
and s*** on the b****** below.

My favorites for Tommy Doc at Man Utd after the press found out of his affair with Mary Brown:

Who’s up Mary Brown
Who’s up Mary Brown
Tommy Tommy Doc, Tommy Tommy Doc etc.

Stanley Bowles of QPR on the announcement in the press his wife was leaving him:

She’s here, she’s there
she’s every F****** where
Stanley’s wife, Stanley’s wife

On this last song blasted from the Kippax, I remember Bowles reacting to the song in a City vs. QPR game, which of course only resulted in the whole of the Kippax joining in and via Match of the Day later, the whole country!

Bring on the Boro!

CITY ON THE BOX IN THE STATES – I

Our Stateside subscribers may like to know that City’s F.A. Cup tie against Middlesbrough on 15th February will shown live by satellite by Setanta Sport in the USA (they broadcast all live Premier League and FA Cup games in the States). I’m told that this will be the first time City have been on TV there this season.

Thanks to Steve Whittle for this information.

P.S. Any SF based Blues who know where the game may be seen – please email me, either tomorrow – 11th Feb – or after that, c/o my brother at finasfish@aol.com. I believe a pub called the “Dirty Dog”(?) shows British ‘soccer’

CITY ON THE BOX IN THE STATES – II

I have an announcement for any City fans living in the Washington DC and surrounding areas. I know of one other but I’m sorry to say I’ve lost your address.

Anyway I have a sneaky feeling that the F.A. Cup game vs. Middlesbrough will be on closed circuit TV in a pub in DC. If anyone is interested please call me after Wednesday on 540 2981211 ext 4335 or 540 2895499. or email at the address below. I will be going there with a Boro fan who is on their mailing list. Following is a transposition of an article which was posted on 6 Feb 1997.

“Reuters said that Man City now have a lucrative home tie against Middlesbrough. It reminded me that Man City were the first 1st Division side I ever saw.”

Boro had a “lucrative” tie away to Man City in the 3rd Round of the F.A. Cup in 1971/72 and I went to the replay at Ayresome. The first game was on 15/01/72, a 1-1 draw, Davy Mills for the Boro and Franny Lee for s***y (I believe he put it in with his hand – the fat get), Attendance 42,620.”

“In the replay on 18/01/72 John Hickton scored Boro’s goal in a marvellous 1-0 win played on a snow covered pitch, Attendance 39,917.”

“This is what Gibbo, Robbo and co. have done for the Boro. We are now “the lucrative club”. Long may it last!”

Andy Horton (Hortona@entcf1.agw.bt.co.uk)

Just thought that you all may be interested in that little snippet. I just hope the City players can give Mr Horton and his overpaid team of so called superstars short shrift. I won’t say any more about our current form or our prospects because we have seen far too many false dawns for my liking. Just suffice to say that even from across the Atlantic I can feel the doom and gloom lifting.

Keep smiling and remember that we have the Manchester moral high ground.

WOT? NO M(U)EN?

Thanks for adding me to the mailing list, guys. Very pleasant indeed, getting up to date info without the typical M.E.N. slant. Can anyone tell me why we keep signing left-sided players? Kevin Horlock sounds like a fair buy, he may turn out to be a good player (and we certainly could use another central midfielder). It just seems to me that maybe a better buy would have involved a player who could play on the right if required. I quite like Buzzer, especially now he’s extracted his finger, but what if he takes a knock, needs a rest or starts playing like a lemon again? Brightwell hasn’t got the pace or the skills and I don’t know if Phillips can play on the right. Let’s face it, all our right-sided players are full-backs. I wonder how much Tony Daley is worth?

P.S. Like the Murphy’s – I’m thick.

HAPPY BLUE

That was the best MCVitee I have read in a long time. Maybe because it’s a positive one. We are actually winning consecutive games. Let’s hope this carries on.

LET’S HEAR IT FOR EIKE

Immel is not that bad.

He is going to join a First, not Second, division club (2. Bundesliga) with a beautiful stadium and a long history (Waldhof Mannheim even playing in blue as well). Anyway, it’s a pity he couldn’t live up to Trautmann’s fame.

POOR OLD JUDAS

Don’t know if Mcivta is the correct place for this but I just want to say how delighted I was to see the close up of Howard Kendall’s face change from joy to dejection when a Sheffield goal was disallowed for offside on Sunday’s TV match. Plus no ‘keeper on the bench; an own goal; 2-3 losing score. I don’t know who is worse, him or squeaky.

Keep up the good work Frank.

PIPSQUEAK

In this morning’s Sun Goals supplement, Frank Clark noted that when he first got the players together, he organised a practice match, to run his eye over them. Gio played in his usual AB position in midfield. Clark said that after 20 minutes he was quite clear that this was not the position for him. Ball had them for a season and a bit, and was unable to work this out.

It was also noted that Frank was hoping to finalise a deal with Forest; they get Cloughie and £2 million; in return we get Wrighty (Wrighty Wrighty) and Barty-Williamsy.

HUMOUR I

Snooker Loopy?

Whilst watching the snooker over the weekend I was struck by these few thoughts:

• Although there are a very large number of red balls, there is only one blue one.
• The red ones bunch together at the southern end of the table, yet are rarely seen at the northern end.
• The blue is worth 5 times as much as any of the red ones.
• Once any of the reds are knocked down they stay down, yet every time the blue gets knocked down it keeps coming back for more.

Hmmmm.

Do you think that “2 of England’s side against Italy” (Shearer, Seaman, Gascoigne, Adams? Oh, you mean David WestHam and Gary Noskille) were taking any notice of these deep thoughts, or were they too busy ‘being noticed’ and participating in the now normal multi-media process of Rag licking?

P.S. Never mind the streaker, these two were the biggest pair of tits on display during the tournament.

HUMOUR II

One day, a man was walking along the beach and came across an odd-looking bottle. Not being one to ignore tradition, he rubbed it and, much to his surprise, a Genie actually appeared.

“For releasing me from the bottle, I will grant you three wishes,” said the Genie.

The man was ecstatic. “But there’s a catch,” the Genie continued. “What catch?” asked the man, eyeing the Genie suspiciously. The Genie replied, “For each of your wishes, every Man United supporter in the world will receive double what you asked for.”

“Hey, I can live with that! No problem!” replied the elated man. “What is your first wish?” asked the Genie. “Well, I’ve always wanted a Ferrari!”

Poof! A Ferrari appeared in front of the man. “Now, every Man United supporter in the world has been given two Ferraris,” said the Genie. “What is your next wish?”

“I could really use a million dollars…” replied the man, and Poof! One million dollars appeared at his feet. “Now, every Man United supporter in the world is two million dollars richer,” the Genie reminded the man. “Well, that’s okay, as long as I’ve got my million,” replied the man.

“And what is your final wish?” asked the Genie.

The man thought long and hard, and finally said, “Well, you know, I’ve always wanted to donate a kidney…”

CITY ICONS OFFER

I have designed a couple of Man City icons for use with Microsoft Windows or OS/2. In case you’re wondering, no, I don’t get out much.

I’ll happily send these icons to anyone who emails me requesting them.

Finally, may I just say that Alan Ball is a dickhead? Thank you very much.

RESULTS

Full-time score and scorers for Sunday, February 9 1997

SHEFFIELD UNITED        2-3    NORWICH CITY
Katchouro (46)                 Johnson (55)
Walker (76)                    Ottosson (74)
                               Holdsworth (og 82)

Full-time scores and scorers for Saturday, February 8 1997

BARNSLEY                1-0    PORT VALE                 12,246
Hendrie (26)
BIRMINGHAM CITY         0-3    PORTSMOUTH                15,897
                               Svennson (3)
                               Bradbury (78)
                               McLoughlin (pen 83)
CRYSTAL PALACE          3-1    BRADFORD CITY             14,844
Shipperley (61)                Waddle (5)
Ndah (65)
Freedman (74)
HUDDERSFIELD TOWN       0-2    WOLVERHAMPTON WANDERERS   15,267
                               Froggatt (37)
                               Bull (84)
IPSWICH TOWN            2-0    QUEENS PARK RANGERS       12,983
Naylor (6)
Gregory (82)
MANCHESTER CITY         3-0    SOUTHEND UNITED           26,261
Rösler (49, 70)
Kinkladze (57)
OLDHAM ATHLETIC         0-3    GRIMSBY TOWN               6,549
                               Oster (12)
                               Woods (19)
                               Mendonca (90)
READING                 3-2    BOLTON WANDERERS          10,739
Morley (56, pen 62, 70)        Thompson (61)
                               McGinlay (64)
WEST BROMWICH ALBION    1-2    SWINDON TOWN              16,219
Hunt (pen 71)                  Allison (42)
                               Smith (76)

Full-time scores and scorers for Friday, February 7 1997

CHARLTON ATHLETIC       3-1    TRANMERE ROVERS           11,283
Kinsella (6)                   Irons (35)
Leaburn (42)
Robson (pen 89)
STOKE CITY              2-1    OXFORD UNITED              8,609
MacKenzie (9)                  Moody (88)
Macari (37)

Full-time score and scorers for Wednesday, February 5 1997

SWINDON TOWN            1-1    QUEENS PARK RANGERS       10,830
Brevett (og 38)                Hateley (40)

Full-time score and scorers for Tuesday, February 4 1997

BIRMINGHAM CITY         2-3    WEST BROMWICH ALBION      21,600
O'Connor (14)                  Taylor (33, 90)
Devlin (pen 55)                Sneekes (78)

Up to and including Sunday, February 9 1997

Team                  Played   Won Drawn Lost  For  Against   Points
Bolton Wanderers        32     18   10    4     67    42        64
Wolverhampton Wanderers 31     16    7    8     44    28        55
Barnsley                30     15    9    6     51    35        54
Sheffield United        30     14    8    9     52    36        50
Norwich City            31     14    7   10     44    44        49
Crystal Palace          30     12   10    8     56    33        46
Stoke City              30     13    7   10     39    41        46
Portsmouth              32     13    6   13     38    37        45
Ipswich Town            31     11   11    9     43    39        44
Queens Park Rangers     32     11   10   11     44    45        43
Tranmere Rovers         31     12    7   12     43    42        43
Port Vale               32     10   13    9     38    36        43
Swindon Town            32     12    6   14     45    42        42
Oxford United           31     11    7   13     42    40        40
Huddersfield Town       32     10   10   12     37    44        40
West Bromwich Albion    32      8   14   10     50    56        38
Charlton Athletic       30     11    5   14     33    41        38
Reading                 31      9   10   12     40    48        37
Birmingham City         29      9   10   10     32    33        37
MANCHESTER CITY         30     10    5   15     36    43        35
Bradford City           32      7   10   15     30    49        31
Grimsby Town            30      7    9   14     38    53        30
Southend United         31      6   11   14     28    55        29
Oldham Athletic         29      6   10   13     30    38        28

WWW MANCHESTER CITY SUPPORTERS’ HOME PAGE:
http://www.uit.no/mancity/

MCIVTA ADDRESSES:
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Club Questions: Stephen – sbolton@buxtonrd.u-net.com

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Editor: