Newsletter #135

Another defeat by the Rags which makes it 21 years since we won at the Swamp and no win for 12 games (I think). However, this seems to have been a good display despite the depredations of the BBC who made it look Rag-dominated on Match of the Day. The BBC did however, manage to show the Neville affair which clearly showed him failing to make contact with the ball and thus dropping Uwe who was clear on goal. Red card you all scream but this is of course The Swamp which means ‘only when he doesn’t have SHARP on his front’ so he got a yellow. Neville protested mightily but the replay showed that he should have been sent off. The boys played with pride so although the Rags had chances, this was primarily towards the end when City were pressing forward in numbers. The Rags’ goal was singled out for analysis by Alan Hansen who quite correctly wondered what Curle was doing right in front of Immel (he unsighted him) whilst the diminutive Edghill was allowed to do Curle’s job and attempt to make the clearing header which he failed miserably to do, handing a free header to Scholes.

Although we still have a single point from 9 games I’ve tried to make this ‘intro’ positive as I honestly believe there are positive things happening and all is nowhere near as gloomy as the press portray it. The Independent of today spent almost all their derby report recounting how City was in full demise off the pitch as well as on. They even had a heart rending tale of little Rags who can’t get into OT but daren’t support City because of what their Rag mates will say! Poor little things.

Onto MCIVTA, we have several match reports including a ‘live’ one from Adam Houghton who bravely infiltrated the Swamp; good job we didn’t score! There’s quite a bit of news including a loan signing as well as opinion and a Why Blue.

Next game, Leeds United at home, Saturday 21st October 1995.

MATCH REPORT ‘LIVE’

MANCHESTER UNITED vs. MANCHESTER CITY, Saturday 14 October, 1995

We came, we saw, but we didn’t quite conquer… we gave it our best shot though, which makes a pleasant change for a derby match!! For once I was proud to be a City fan (even if I wasn’t brave enough to announce it at the Swamp) after the effort that every single player put into the match. They actually looked like they were proud to wear the blue shirt and even though we didn’t win, that made all the difference for me. After previous débâcles, where certain players looked like they were on the United payroll, this is all I could have asked for.

The game started off with shades of the previous OT derby when nobody attempted to pick up Scholes when Giggs whipped in a corner and Curle deflected the shot into the back of the net (unlucky as Immel had it covered all the way). Whose job it was to mark Scholes I’m not sure but both Edghill and Rösler looked rather redundant. Suddenly I came over in a cold sweat thinking of the nightmare that was probably about to occur. United then seemed to dominate the match until City’s midfield started to exert some of their own dominance in the midfield (no I wasn’t dreaming, it really was happening!). The game then proceeded like many previous derbies with not a lot of action but quite a few niggling fouls which the referee seemed to think were all our fault. Then the first glaring opportunity came City’s way, when Rösler seemed to get past two United defenders only to be brought down by Neville. In my book it was a clear professional foul as Uwe was through on goal with no defenders between him and the big dumb blonde. However the referee (not swayed by the crowds reaction in any way??) decided otherwise!!!

The next chance came Quinn’s way after Panicster failed to clear the ball, leaving Quinn a clear shot on goal. How he missed it only God knows but instead of burying it he tried to place it out of blondie’s reach. This he did but he also put the ball out of the net’s reach. I still believe that if that shot had gone in the three points might have gone to Maine Road (sounds like a John Motson cliché).

In the second half Quinn seemed to have another good chance but again fluffed it. The balance then went United’s way and only Immel’s quick reactions saved City from going further down. First Giggs had a clear shot on goal from the right side and then Cole tried to slot it under the keeper but Immel was too quick for him. City’s final chance was off the boot of Edghill (no I’ve not got the names mixed up) when he hit a beautiful shot from outside the area at the bottom right hand side of the goal which Manchester’s third best goalie only just managed to get to. The nightmare never occurred!!!!

I won’t mention every City player, but in defence Symons (who gets my vote for man of the match) was brilliant even though he did make a frightening backpass to Immel in the second half. In the air he was supreme. In midfield Flitcroft grafted for 90 minutes, and in combination with Kinky, dominated midfield to such an extent that Ferguson attempted to rectify things by bringing on Sharpe and McClair (most United fans will put this down to Keane being injured… bollocks!). Beagrie also made some useful crosses, but when he took a swipe at one of the Rags AB decided to bring him off. This didn’t go down well at all with Beagrie, to such an extent that he initially refused to come off, which showed to some extent the commitment of our players. Summerbee then came on and received some beautiful balls from Flipper, and then proceeded to skin the United full back. I quickly wiped my eyes to see if I was seeing things and checked if I had taken any mind altering substances. Nope, he did it again!! At last he’s acting like a winger.

After reading this you’re probably wondering why we didn’t win or at least draw, and I have to say I left the Swamp thinking the same thing. Maybe with a few thousand City fans behind them they would have? This brings me to my next point which is the absence of away fans. It was apparent from the start that the referee’s judgement was swayed by the reaction of the crowd, and more often than not an innocuous challenge by a City player was greeted by a yellow card. However this was not the case when the United players were guilty of such offences. It is impossible for a referee to be unbiased when there are only home supporters, and in my opinion the FA should do something to rectify the problem.

However I came home proud to be a City fan. Every player gave 100% in this game and I can’t criticise a single person, which certain readers will probably find unbelievable after some of my previous contributions to MCIVTA. Even Paddy Crerand (ex-Rag on Piccadilly radio) said City were unlucky to come away without at least a draw and he couldn’t understand why City were propping up the Premiership. My final comment is to anybody who watched the game on Match of the Day, don’t believe the hype!! The TV gave the impression it was United all the way (how unusual… not!!!), but I’m glad to say that wasn’t the case. Any United fan telling you they could have won it 5-0 again (and there were a lot of these at the Swamp) is speaking through his red arse. A few more performances like that and it might not be the end of the world after all!

MATCH REPORT ‘LIVE ON TV’

MANCHESTER U****D vs. MANCHESTER CITY, Saturday 14 October, 1995

As the match was televised here in Norway, I would like to try to make a match report on the basis of what I saw on the TV. Before the game Kåre Ingebrigtsen and Aage Hareide (played with City in the early 80’s) were present in the studio. Kåre confirmed that he is going back to Manchester with a fighting attitude. Hareide said he was still a City supporter after all the years.

The line-up was just about how I fancied it. Quinn playing up front and Lomas back in midfield was a good selection in my mind. Otherwise the rest was like usual. The game started off surprisingly slowly; the absence of City supporters in the stadium made the atmosphere low and the players calmer. After 5 minutes what I feared would happen… happened. Scholes profited from Edghill’s poor marking and headed home (via the head of Curle) 1-0… I will not use more space and energy describing that goal as we all are trying to forget it.

What could we expect now? City coming forward, just for the Rags to get us on the counter-attacks? That’s what I thought would happen, just like so many times before. I was fearing last year’s nightmare, but fortunately I was wrong. What I saw was a fighting City side who worked all the way. A few minutes later Uwe took profited from poor Rags defending and broke through on goal, only to be tripped by Gary Neville. I was waiting for the red card, but I always knew it wouldn’t come. At Old Trafford home players are being sent off only once every decade, and I believe Paul Parker was sent off a few seasons ago, so I knew it would be a booking. Allthough I knew the ref was only going to book the player, I was disgusted and angry. The rules are simple; Uwe was brought down with a clear run on goal – that means a sending off! Professional foul.

City kept most of the possession. Then after 20 minutes, Quinn won a header inside the penalty area and almost looped the header over the oppsition’s goalkeeper. Quinn was superb in the air all the game and the only headers Pallister (by the way how can such a player be in the English national side? Just asking.) won was with help of his arm or simply climbing on Niall’s back. However, no matter how good Quinn was in the air, he should have levelled the score midway through the first half; Pallister (who else) made a defensive blunder and Quinn was completely free on goal in front of Schmeichel. I was just about to raise my hands and celebrate the goal when I saw the ball went outside. I could not believe it! How could he miss such an opportunity!

There were no more City chances in the first half, despite the possession and pressure we had. The Rags had a few chances in the last moments of the half; Cole was superbly denied by Immel and Scholes miskicked the ball 1 yard from goal after City had messed it up in their own penalty area. Even though we were a goal down at half time, I didn’t feel this was out of our reach. The team had played well as a unit. The defence looked good, Flitcroft worked hard in midfield with Lomas. Kinkladze creative and full of ideas. The two frontmen were working hard as well.

The second half started off with City pressure and possesion. However, the chances didn’t come. Flitcroft and Kinkladze made some long range efforts, but without reaching the target. Beagrie was taken off early in the second half to be replaced by Summerbee. Begrie was involved in an incident with Gary Neville a few minutes earlier, where he was taken down from behind and he kicked Neville back in frustration. Perhaps Ball thought his temper was a bit too high and he took him off for that reason. However, Neville should have been booked for the tackle, but got away with it again. Typical. The first real opportunity for City came midway into the half with Quinn breaking into the Rags’ penalty erea, but instead of continuing his run he tried to curl the ball around the goalie from 12 yards, only to be saved by the goalkeeper. I felt he could have done much better with this chance, we should have been level…

A few minutes later Richard Edghill hit a shot from about 20 yards which almost found its way into the net by the post, but the goalie blocked it again. City kept up the pressure, but didn’t manage to break into the opposition’s penalty area. Instead, U****d were very dangerous on their counter-attacks. Cole had three great oppurtunities to put them two up. One was put wide, another was headed just outside and the last one suberbly blocked by Immel. One of the better saves I have seen for quite a while. The Rags had quite a few chances in the end, but it doesn’t mean that we defended badly. Simply because we had to come forward and leave them space.

Towards the end Creaney came on for Quinn, not to make any impact at all. The only thing he did was to lose possession a number of times. To be honest he doesn’t look like great quality to me (understatement). City failed to create more chances and thus we lost the game. I felt it was very unfair considering our missed chances and the fact that Neville should have been sent off. But I think the lads fought well and we were the better side on the pitch. “Kinky” was named “man of the match” by the Norwegian commentators. They were very impressed by him and though they would see a lot of him in the future (hopefully in a blue shirt). If the lads can keep on like they did today, the turning point can be just around the corner.

Final Score: U****d 1 City 0

Here’s my view on the individual players’ performance in the game:

Immel – 9

Definitely my “man of the match”. Made some superb saves andalways looked comfortable with back passes. It will be very hard for TC toget back into the side if Immel keeps this form.

Edghill – 6

I would give him 7 if it wasn’t for his poor marking when therags scored. Otherwise he took easily care of Giggs.

Phelan – 7

Made some great runs forward and caused problems to the slowU****d defenders. Defended well.

Curle – 7

Organized the defence and made many important interceptions.

Symons – 8

Impressive performance. Played with enormous self confidence.Played intellegently and calmly. Seems to be the ideal partner to Curle.

Lomas – 7

Tackled well. He played with enthusiasm and confidence. Has hisform returned?

Flitcroft – 8

Gave everything for City on the day. Enormous work-rate. Ihave never seen him so committed. If he keeps on like he did in thisgame, we’ll survive.

Kinkladze – 8

Started off quietly but througout the game he showed that heis one of the best midfielders in Europe. Adds a new dimension to City’splay with his intelligent and neat passes. We must build our team aroud thislad. A potential “super-star”. Can we keep him?

Beagrie – 7

At times he did great stuff but for long periods was out of thegame. Returning to form.

Rösler – 7

Worked very hard without achieving too much. He was often fouledwithout getting free-kicks.

Quinn – 7

He should have scored when he was clean trough on goal. Anothergreat chance in the second half. He was superb in the air and made Pallisterlook like a schoolboy. Let’s him get a new chance.

Summerbee – 6

Came on for Beagrie early in the second half. Instantly hemade some good runs and crosses, but disappeared eventually.

Creaney

Played too short a time to get rated. Never made any impact whatsoever.But to his defence I must say that he came on when City’s pressure hadeased.

So to conclude the report I would say I am more optimistic now than after the Arsenal game. Hopefully brighter times are just around the corner.

MATCH REPORT ‘LIVE ON TV’

MANCHESTER U****D vs. MANCHESTER CITY, Saturday 14 October, 1995

It’s getting to be a habit, watching City-United on telly with my pencil in my mouth 🙂 It wasn’t a good game however, but City was not the worst team on the pitch this Saturday.

The teams lined up as follows:

            Immel                           Schmeichel
Edghill Symons Curle Phelan   G.Neville Pallister Bruce P.Neville
 Kinky Flipper Lomas Beagrie         Beckham Butt Keane Giggs
          Quinn Rösler                       Cole Scholes

The crowd was all pro-United, and you could hear it as the cheers only went one way. I imagine that the referee noticed it too, because he gave the Rags the advantage most of the time. Anyway it gets pretty lame with such a one-way crowd, doesn’t it?

The match started with Kinky missing a pass. After hearing so many positive comments about him I found out that he finally had sorted out how to play the English way, and therefore started missing passes. After a while I had to think twice. The guy was brilliant with the ball, but didn’t find any support for his passes.

After 5 minutes a corner from Giggs was met by an unmarked Scholes. His header was going right into the arms of Immel, when Curle popped up and nodded the ball past the stunned goalkeeper. Yeah it’s going to be one of those days I thought.

Immel hit a couple of bad goal kicks. He didn’t seem to have the strength to kick the ball upfield. Quinn seemed frustrated, as none of the long-balls was directed to him. Perhaps Ball is trying to get rid of those sort of tactics? Rösler on the other hand didn’t seem to get his kind of balls either. However, after 15 minutes he chased between two United defenders; he showed his strength and speed, just running clear of Pallister and Gary Neville. The latter tried to tackle, but watched in horror as Rösler was chopped to the ground. This was midway into United’s half, and Rösler was through on goal. I had my suspicions, and wasn’t shocked when the referee showed Neville the yellow card. It was an act of cowardliness from Mr. Dilkes.

City were in no mood of getting last year’s thrashing, and worked really hard. Especially Lomas, who was showing commitment, whilst Flitcroft was a bit out of position. To me he was a disappointment. He was nowhere most of the time and never really looked dangerous. Kinky made some good moves, but it always stopped just outside the United penalty area. No one was running and everyone just watched as he moved upfield. Neither Flicroft nor Lomas came from behind to give support, and most of the time it was easy meat for the United defence. After 30 minutes Pallister screwed up and left Quinn clear on goal. Quinn had all the time in the world and aimed carefully, only to see his shot fly wide of the far post. A better striker would have scored! A few minutes later Symons nearly made the same mistake, but Immel cleared the ball just in front of Cole. United got the last good chance of the half when Scholes missed the goal from 5 yards.

The second half started with a couple of bookings. United didn’t look dangerous most of the time, and it continued to look promising. Most of their chances were created by Giggs, and squandered by Cole. Their midfield didn’t get much from Lomas and Kinky, and Edghill made Giggs look anonymous every time he went walkabout on our right side. Keane showed some of his naughty tackling, but was overshadowed by Lomas, who gained a yellow card after flattening Scholes. Phelan handballed when he was caught out of position, and Curle kicked Cole in the butt for his yellow card. Beagrie was replaced by Summerbee after 60 minutes, and didn’t seem too happy with that decision, Sharpe replaced Scholes shortly after.

Summerbee showed some good moves, but most of the time he wasn’t involved in his position far out on the right-hand side. In this period United showed their best form of the match, with good chances falling to Butt and Giggs. Immel made some really good saves to keep it 1-0. After 78 minutes McClair replaced Keane, and Quinn was taken off for Creaney. This was never likely to be effective, as we now had no way to match Pallister in the air. Quinn had done a good job directing balls for Rösler, and winning battles against Pallister. Creaney showed his potential on a couple of occasions; losing the ball to United defenders with much ease.

So the game faded away, and we’re left with only one point at the bottom of the table. There’s no use complaining about the referee because Quinn should have scored in the first half. The team looked a bit unsettled, and out of formation. I think we should quit playing with wingers as they’re simply not good enough for the job. Immel made some good saves, but had trouble communicating with Symons on one occasion. Coton will make a difference IMHO. Edghill must be satisfied after marking Giggs out of the match. Curle and Symons played well, but I don’t think Symons has the same qualites as his partner. Phelan nearly created a goal with his speed. Kinky is the main solution to our problems I think. If the rest of the team can give him enough support he’ll create lots of chances. Too often he ran upfield, waving his arms trying to get players to run into positions. Most of the time Rösler and Quinn just stood there watching, and only Beagrie seemed interested in getting the ball. Flipper was disappointing. Is he already playing for Blackburn in his mind?

Bally is trying to build the team around Kinky. That might be a good idea, but we haven’t got the players yet. Lomas and Flipper must give the Georgian more support from behind, and Rösler must show more interest. Quinn’s heading power should not be wasted. This Saturday he was a lone ranger most of the time.

Final result 1-0

MAINE ROAD VIEW

It was an interesting experience to be one of the 4,000+ crowd in Maine Road on Saturday afternoon to watch the TV relay of the Derby match from the Swamp. I sat in B block adjacent to the directors’ box and had an excellent view of the big screen, which was situated in the middle of the centre circle. The quality of the picture was good – it was relayed by the BBC Match of the Day team, and we had the full John Motson commentary. At least we heard John Motson’s voice only occasionally when the supporters’ noise died down. The atmosphere was excellent, apart from when the rags scored after 4 minutes, at which point there was a deathly silence.

I thought City played their best football of the season. If only they are able to continue at this level of commitment then perhaps all is not yet lost. It was good to see the midfield dominating play for long periods and Flitcroft had arguably his best game so far. For me the man of the match was Symons, but surely we can do better than Richard Edghill at right back? Immel is proving to be an excellent shot stopper and the balance of opinion was that T.C. would find it difficult to get his place back.

Poor old Quinney had the miss of the season. He will have been extremely embarrassed to watch his tame effort, right in front of goal, on Match of the Day. He ought to have buried it in the old onion bag. Beagrie showed one or two touches of his old wizardry but was substituted for Nicky Summerbee, presumably because he had been given one yellow card and looked a candidate for another. What price a 10 minutes “sin bin” to let irate players cool off!

Bally’s last throw of the dice was to bring Creaney on for Quinn. I don’t rate him at all. After the match I talked with a member of the Maine Road staff who told me that the training staff don’t rate Creaney either and that it was Alan Ball who wanted him at Maine Road.

Fergie’s face on the big screen brought a howl of boos; when Bally was shown there was deathly silence. I suppose it means that we neither love him nor hate him yet – the jury is still out. Personally I’ve watched him and Asa at the training sessions at Platt Lane and he appears to be concentrating on “skills” rather than the 5-a-sides of previous regimes.

Even though the bare statistical facts of the League table make me cringe every time I think about them, perhaps the display today was the first green shoots of recovery (with apologies to Norman Lamont – and look what happened to him ! )

I watched the BBC Match of the Day programme later and was amazed at the imbalance of the coverage. From watching the programme it looked as though the rags dominated the game when in reality City’s second half performance was good and we certainly had equal territorial advantage. We deserved a draw. Roll on Leeds United, Yeboah etc..

NEWS

Shock Horror Exclusive (as reported in the News of the World)

Since we are a bit thin on the ground for news I thought it might be worth reporting the whole page story ‘exclusive’ from last Sunday’s NoW (last week’s). You must decide for yourselves whether it can be taken seriously…

In a nutshell: Franny Lee is quoted: “If some other other mug wants to take over I’d be willing to walk out tomorrow” and “I never wanted to get involved in the first place, but so many people asked me. I took it because I thought I could do a good job and I think I am doing a good job, but if you reckon there’s someone better around the corner, get him.”

The article then goes on … ‘for the first time … Lee is under business pressure and he doesn’t like it. He grimaces “When I go into my office (toilet rolls) I say ‘Any good news? They say Yes, we’ve got this…’ but when I walk into the football club and ask the same question it’ll be ‘No, this or that’s gone wrong.’ Something always goes wrong!”

‘Lee is coy about the exact amount he has put into the club but insists: “If you can find anybody to put in the same as I have he can be chairman tomorrow. I’ve put in a huge personal investment… and we are getting it right… When you’ve a wage bill of £5.5m and you get the same amount from the gate money it doesn’t take an Einstein to work out you are supplementing the business…”‘

There is more in a similar vein … sorry no time to precis it but it can be summarised as I’m doing a hard job well and the reason for poor performance rests with the men in the blue shirts.

NEWS – McNALLY?

Ceefax reports that City are signing Celtic defender Mark McNally (who, according to the Celtic WWW is a Scottish International) on a two-week trial. He’s currently on a monthly contract.

Ceefax reports this and also that Royle (Everton) is interested in tempting Phelan to Goodison and will let Barry Horne go in exchange!

RUMOUR – RÖSLER CLAUSE?

I heard a rumour (and I must stress it is only a rumour!!), that Rösler’s new contract has got a clause in it which says he can be released from Maine Road if we are relegated. The person who gave me this info, also said that Rösler could be sold for just over £1 million if he chooses to leave. I think this rumour came from one of the lower quality papers, so I don’t know how much truth is in it. It would explain the “problems” Uwe and Lee had in reaching a deal.

HEAVEN OR HELL?

The Norwegian element of MCIVTA will be treated to the Derby live on Norwegian TV on Saturday. Freak as I am, I believe it will be rather fun – if there’s ever to be a turnaround, this is the time.

For whatever reason, I’m so confident about this game that I’m having two of my buddies over for it, who of course, like all the other bandwaggoners, think the Rags are the cat’s arse.

Their presence leaves me very vulnerable here, folks, so I ask for the greatest possible effort Saturday. From the depths of my imagination I predict that City stuns the home team and triumphs with a well deserved 3-1 win.

Go Kinky!

RESERVE GAME – ADDENDUM

I got home last night, unearthed my classy photocopied team sheet from Tuesday’s reserve team game and noted the promising youngsters whose names I had forgotton:

Aled Rowlands, the nippy left-winger;
Steve Brennan, the terrier-like foward;
Chris Beech, the left-back.

Will we ever see these names up in lights?

TWO WINGERS OR ONE?

Just read your (Svenn’s) review of the Manchester Derby. Thought it was a fair reflection on the match, but just had a comment to make. Are we actually playing with two or one wingers? There can’t have been many occasions this season that we have actually played with Beagrie on the left and Summerbee on the right. Summerbee seems to have hit a point in his career where his confidence is shot to bits, while Beagrie has rushed back from injury only to find that Ball doesn’t seem to like him! I’m convinced that given a few more run-outs Beagrie will be able to deliver the goods, but if it doesn’t happen then we should sell him, buy a left-back and put Phelan on the left wing!

“..oh city… you’ve got me singing the blues….”

OPINION – STRETFORD COMMENT

1-0 and we dominated the game. Even the papers and radio said that Stretford were lucky. Given our historical record at the Swamp and our recent run I must be honest and say that I would have taken a 1-0 loss if you had offered it to me before the match. Mind you, I no longer live in Manchester so I no longer have to endure the p*ss take on Monday mornings (as much).

Next week is Leeds at home where we normally have a good record against them – I remember the two 4-0’s very well indeed (even though I would have been happy losing one of them as it would have hindered Stretford’s title chances).

Who also remembers Ian Brightwell’s goal? – a beautiful piece of football which would of been contender for goal of the season were it from another team and player.

OPINION – EMPEROR HAS NO CLOTHES!

I’m a cursed life-long Blue, ex season ticket Kippax to North Stand, and emigrated to Canada a few years ago. With satellite, I’m fortunate (Maybe Unfor..) enough to see key games, and thank goodness for the MCVITA mailing.

By nature, I’m very positive and try and look for the best in people in situations. Even out of a bad situation there must be some good, right?

But, as I sat in the local Markham pub, the “lone blue ranger”, surrounded by a horde of rags plus others, fairly sympathetic and objective, I was totally embarrassed. Is this a case of “Emperor has no clothes”? Can’t we see the grand canyon? Are we deluding ourselves? This is by far the weakest Blue side I have ever seen, even the eighties stuff was more enterprising. We are going to get relegated fast. Let’s face it with the exception of the Germans (Eike and Uwe), and flashes of Kinky, there is absolutely nothing there.

The midfield is a total joke; to rely on two mediocre youths, Flitcroft and Lomas, to carry the team is unacceptable. Experience is key, Peter Reid/McMahon yes, did hold it in the middle.

The defence pushing into attack through talentless fullbacks Edghill/Phelan is a joke.

To round it off a fistful of yellow cards for nothing, and repeated game to game. We were a joke, totally embarrasing, no confidence. Fortunately the rags almost dropped to our pathetic level of play.

So let us wake up and force a change; the fans forced it with Swales, Ball is a 1966 world cup god. Can he manage? Talk to fans from his previous clubs, Portsmouth and Southampton. Book has the best track record to date, let’s use it. I don’t want to wait for 5 years for Franny to put it right, I’ve been waiting since 1979, when Swales wrecked a solid side.

WHY BLUE?

I live in Motherwell, Scotland, and as well as being an avid Motherwell fan I also love City. This streches way back to the late seventies and early eighties. My uncle lives in Mossley and we visit him regularly. So when I was a young and impressionable child I was taken along to Maine Road to watch City. Now my memory is bad at the best of times but I can remember playing both Coventry (3-1 win I think) and Spurs (the only thing I can remember is Joe Corrigan dribbling the ball past Steve Archibald). The rest I’m afraid is lost in the gloomy hole which is my memory.

Since then I’ve been a City fan through thick and thin. This is especially hard in Scotland where people wonder why I don’t support a fashionable club, but I dont care; at least I’m not a Red. It is hard to get down though, especially as a penniless postgrad student. I only made the one game last season (versus Crystal Palace 1-1), but I’m planning to get to the Chelsea game on the 23rd December. That’s all I have to say, except that no matter how bad they get I’ll always love City.

BLUE HUMOUR

Alan Ball was caught speeding on his way to Maine Road today. “I’ll do anything for 3 points”, he said.

Francis Lee is considering replacing Alan Ball with Steve Davis. Explaining this unusual move, Lee said “we don’t just need points now, we need snookers!”

These might be lost on our overseas readers…

BLUE HUMOUR

The fact that it was all of 24 hours ago since I last had a dig at Francis Lee and Manchester City FC seems a good enough excuse (if one were needed) to… have another dig at Francis Lee and Manchester City FC!! Here’s an amusing joke to keep you smiling:

It’s July (close season) at Maine Road, and Francis Lee is reclining in his office chair, allowing himself the luxury of reflecting with some measure of pride on what a smashing club he’s got (etc., etc.). Anyway (and after he’s put the Kleenex away), the thought suddenly hits him square in the face (podgy, of course) that he should really show his appreciation to everyone at the club by a gesture of some sort. So, he gets thinking, and gradually a plan starts to take shape (money being no object, etc., etc.) (and him not being cheap, naturally). “Ah, yes!!” says Franny, “a cruise…”…

The following weekend sees the entire club, from Franny himself right down to the tea ladies (even Swales is invited), meandering down the Manchester Ship Canal on board a refitted coal barge. Quality!! “Ah, yes”, sighs Lee, “what a cracking suprise this has turned out to be and no mistake!”, as he admires the sight before his eyes (podgy, of course). “Everyone seems to be having a great time, and the chilled Boddingtons is going down a treat as well.”

Suddenly, without warning, the tranquility is shattered by a member of the crew, who comes sprinting up to the bridge (or whatever it’s called on refitted coal barges) in a state of some distress. “Captain, captain”, he says to the skipper, “I’m afraid someone’s shit on the deck!!” “F*****g hell, I’ll soon put a stop to that sort of behaviour on my lovely refitted coal barge!!” replies the captain, and reaches for his tannoy.

“Calling all passengers! It’s just been brought to my attention that someone’s shit on the deck! Come on, own up, who is it?” he blasts.

After a long and painfully embarrassing silence, Niall Quinn eventually raises his hand, and mutters…

“OK, it’s a fair cop, but I’m not bad in the air…!!”

RESULTS

Sunday, October 15 1995

SHEFFIELD WEDNESDAY   0-1    MIDDLESBROUGH          21,177

Saturday, October 14 1995

ASTON VILLA           0-1    CHELSEA                34,922
BLACKBURN ROVERS      2-1    SOUTHAMPTON            26,780
BOLTON WANDERERS      1-1    EVERTON                20,427
LEEDS UNITED          0-3    ARSENAL                38,552
LIVERPOOL             0-0    COVENTRY CITY          39,079
MANCHESTER UNITED     1-0    MANCHESTER CITY        35,707
QUEENS PARK RANGERS   2-3    NEWCASTLE UNITED       18,254
TOTTENHAM HOTSPUR     0-1    NOTTINGHAM FOREST      32,876

Mon 16 Oct

Team                Played   Won Drawn Lost  For  Against   Points
Newcastle United       9      8    0    1     20     6        24
Manchester United      9      6    2    1     17    10        20
Arsenal                9      5    3    1     13     5        18
Middlesbrough          9      5    3    1     10     4        18
Liverpool              9      5    2    2     15     7        17
Nottingham Forest      9      4    5    0     15     9        17
Aston Villa            9      5    2    2     12     6        17
Leeds United           9      5    1    3     14    12        16
Chelsea                9      4    3    2     10     7        15
Tottenham Hotspur      9      4    2    3     14    12        14
Blackburn Rovers       9      3    1    5     12    14        10
Wimbledon              8      3    1    4     13    16        10
Queens Park Rangers    9      3    0    6      9    15         9
Everton                9      2    2    5     11    14         8
Sheffield Wednesday    9      2    2    5      8    12         8
Coventry City          9      1    4    4      7    17         7
West Ham United        8      1    3    4      7    11         6
Southampton            9      1    3    5      8    16         6
Bolton Wanderers       9      1    2    6      9    19         5
Manchester City        9      0    1    8      3    15         1

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